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Life is a Puzzle. Master the Pieces. Live well.

My Ego

Tips

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THE PUZZLE TIPS

MY EGO

How to use the puzzle tips ? 

MYSELF

EGO

PRESENT

CONNECT

FILTER

COMPASS

PROTECTION

POLLUTION

RULES

MASTER

The Puzzle is a modular framework: use the tips you need, when you need it

Choose the Puzzle piece you want to focus on

Apply one tip associated to that Puzzle piece for 7 days in-a-row, and witness visible progress.
Science shows that it takes in total 3 weeks to settle a habit. The first 7 days to get used to it and ensure it suits you. The 2nd week will be challenging as this is when we fight and question a change. By the end of the 3rd week, you will crave to practice and the tip will be with you forever!

TIPS - My Ego

HOW TO COME DOWN MY EGO

TRAIN MY EGO

PARTNER WITH MY EGO

Dare me to ignore it—my Ego cannot stand it!
My Ego sees itself as my old, loving parent. It remembers everything I’ve experienced since birth and shapes how I consciously and unconsciously view the world. Its primary job is to keep me safe, and it does so by constantly warning me about what could happen "if."

However, much of what my Ego says is based on assumptions—some of which are absolutely logical, while others reflect the logic of a 3-year-old. What’s unique about my Ego is that every single thought it presents carries absolute certainty. In the world of my Ego, there is no room for doubt.

This certainty means my Ego always believes it’s right. And when it turns out not to be, it reacts like a young child: it blames me. On top of warning me about hypothetical future problems, it criticizes me relentlessly. It tells me I’m not doing enough, that I need to try harder, that I’m too much of one thing and not enough of another.

When you combine its immense willpower with its tendency to see challenges everywhere, warn me about them, and blame me for them, my Ego can make my life a living hell if left unchecked. It pushes me to live cautiously, avoid risks, and refrain from action out of fear of making things worse. In the end, I’m left stressed and paralyzed, believing that any move I make will only lead to failure.

So here’s the truth: I need to take back control.
Because if I don’t, this scenario is my reality.

And so I shall treat my Ego for what it is: a child.
To regain control, I need to treat my Ego like what it truly is—a child. And what do children crave most? Attention from those they love.
If a child doesn’t get the attention they want, what happens? They throw a tantrum and create a big drama. In the case of my Ego, this manifests as panic and anxiety, all designed to grab my focus.

Instead of fighting with my Ego—because that would mean fighting with myself, which is counterproductive and exhausting—I’ll give it the attention it seeks. Always keep the metaphor in mind: if a 3-year-old child wants to play with me and I tell them to stop, how well will that end? The same goes for my Ego.

Let's addressing calming my Ego. When my Ego starts acting up, I’ll listen to what it has to say. I’ll treat it as I would a young child, gently calming it down:

Reassure it: “It’s going to be OK.”
Thank it for trying to protect me: “Thank you for warning me.”
Show it love: “I love you, even if you’re a bit annoying sometimes.”
Remind it we’re in this together: “We’re a team.”
By doing this, I’ll watch as the tone of my Ego’s voice softens.

Instead of letting it control me or fighting against it, I’ll redirect its energy. And in doing so, I’ll reclaim my peace of mind.

My Ego has a lot of strong will. It’s active 24 hour a day, 7 days a week, never taking a break.
So if I want to be the one in charge, I need to train it. 

At first, it’s going to hate this. It will resist with everything it has. Why wouldn’t it? It’s been the boss for years, and now it’s supposed to step down to second place? No way! And honestly, who would willingly accept that?

As I establish my authority, I should expect my Ego to develop tactics to convince me that this is the worst idea I’ve ever had. Since it’s clever, it will try to distract me, get me to postpone, or make me feel too tired to act today. It will play on my fears: “What if you’re not capable of being in charge?” It will plant seeds of doubt and use any deflection strategy it can.

Ultimately, the goal is to have my Ego serve me (cf. the tip "Partner with my Ego"). And to make it happen, we need to set the stage for change. 

Because my Ego is often tied to my gut reactions, I’ll approach it at the same intuitive level. 
I’ll choose a simple, immediate physical activity, and each time I catch my Ego being in charge—like when I notice myself spiraling into thoughts about everything that could go wrong—I’ll do the activity. No overthinking, so it becomes a reflex. Cause and effect happening in a blink.

The activity I choose must be physical, accessible, and realistic. For instance, I won’t commit to running an hour each time my Ego acts up—that would be unsustainable! I also should not pick an activity that is not doing me good - for instance drink a glass of water each time my ego manifests, and end up with a stomach full of water. 
So I should choose something small but effective. 
For instance, doing 3 push-ups. Or holding a wall-sit position for 1 minute (using a phone timer). Or jumping bringing my knees up for 30 seconds. 

If I’m at the office or in a place where I can’t do the activity immediately, I’ll note it down and promise to complete it as soon as possible. Crucially, all activities must be completed on the same day—delaying beyond that breaks the connection between cause and effect.

This practice has 3 key benefits:

1. The idea is simple: while my Ego resists, I’ll demonstrate to both it and myself that I have an equally strong will. Since my Ego is me, this shows my strength in a different, positive form.

2. The physical activity reconnects me to my body and anchors me in the present, reducing the Ego’s influence since it exists only in my head. By interrupting my Ego’s habitual dominance, I break its natural pattern of control.
Over time, I’ll get used to consciously taking the lead in my life.

3. Reminding myself that nature hates empty seats: if I don’t sit on my own throne, my Ego will. 

As I practice the habit of leading my life, it will become easier for my Ego to serve me in ways that benefit me. It’s a process, and with consistency, I’ll reclaim my role as the one in charge.

The objective of partnering with my Ego is to channel hall its strength to benefit me.
Think about it: this little voice in my head is always active. Constantly scanning everything around me. Never takes a break, never takes prisoners. It’s solely focused on my well-being, relentlessly.
If I could fully access and direct all this energy and capability, happy days! That would be an unbreakable mind working entirely in my favor. 

This is what this tip is about: evolving the way my Ego helps me. 
Because right now, it’s acting like a young child—misreading situations, worrying about hypothetical events, and burning my energy to prevent things that might never happen. This behavior comes from a caring place, but it’s far from optimal. Not to mention the additional stress it causes by dwelling on negative scenarios and constantly pointing out what I’m doing wrong to avoid imagined outcomes.

So the first step is to dance with my Ego
I won’t get my Ego to collaborate by fighting it. Sure, it can be annoying at times, but I have a greater purpose in mind: I want to direct all its capabilities to serve me so I can focus on living an amazing life, not just surviving struggles. That means I need to convince my Ego there’s a better way to help me.

As often as I can, I should speak to my Ego and explain that I am now an adult with different needs and expectations for its support. Reassure it that I need its help but in a different way. Explain to it what changes we are putting in place together, and why. Remind it, over and over - because it does need a lot of reassurance. In its world, there is a lot of fear - and this is not where this story ends. 

I should then be very specific about what I need. 
To get my Ego to help, I need to give it clear tasks and ask it to support me in ways that align with my goals. 

For example:
- Reading body language: During a conversation, I can ask my Ego to focus on the other person’s body language. I’ll ask it to share facts that lead to its judgments, so I can form my own opinions. For example, if someone avoids eye contact, my Ego might conclude they’re untrustworthy. But it could also mean they’re introverted or thinking deeply. I want the facts first, then its opinion.
- Standing up for myself: When I need to assert myself, my Ego can be my most powerful ally. I can ask it to fuel my strength to push back, hold my position, and not give up—on my own terms and in my style.
- Boosting creativity: My Ego already spends its days inventing scenarios to anticipate potential risks. I’ll ask it to redirect that creativity toward finding positive solutions for my challenges.
- Staying determined: If I feel like giving up on something important, I can call on my Ego’s determination. If I doubt myself, I’ll ask my Ego to transport me into its world—where doubt doesn’t exist, and nothing can stand in my way.

It is all about using my Ego consciously.
What I want is to intentionally call on my Ego for support and tie its skills to my specific needs. Once I’ve used its help, I’ll acknowledge its contribution—just as I would with a trusted partner. Gratitude strengthens bonding.

After the fact, I should make sure to thank my Ego for its help. Acknowledging its value makes it feel useful and appreciated, so it will want to help me again.

Through this process, I’ll notice that my Ego becomes more eager to assist. 
Since I’m not challenging its purpose or presence—both of which center on taking good care of me—it feels fulfilled when I call on it. The more I treat it as a partner, the more it will act like one, giving me its full support.

CONGRATULATIONS!

MYSELF

EGO

PRESENT

CONNECT

FILTER

COMPASS

PROTECTION

POLLUTION

RULES

MASTER

YOU ARE MASTERING THE PUZZLE PIECE MY EGO! 
WELL DONE!

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